Posted on by Abe Austin

Blasphemous Anger Fantasies

A Smug Fantasy)

One of the most common fantasies is imagining someone who has upset us finally having to eat crow and admit that we were right all along. Here are the two most common forms of this fantasy:

  1. Picturing those that have wronged us having negative consequences for their own flaws. The very qualities that they used to hurt us end up hurting themselves, and it is so profound of an experience that they realize their entire life philosophy was wrong.
  2. Picturing those that doubted us watching on as we succeed in every measure where they thought we would fail. They wonder how they could have been so wrong in gauging our worth and they regret the missed opportunity to be a part of our success.

Both forms of the fantasy include the same central component of enjoyment at the groveling penitence of those that have wronged us. I have always felt intuitively that there is something wrong with entertaining this sort of fantasy. It’s too smug, too self-congratulatory, and too judgmental to be a good thing.

As I’ve thought about it further, I’ve realized there is something even deeper amiss with it, something about it that violates a fundamental commandment. It is, in fact, blasphemous.

Making Oneself God)

I’ve come to realize that this fantasy is all about making myself a god over the people that wronged me. Common elements in the fantasy are that the person who committed the offense:

  1. Comes to a recognition of his sin.
  2. Approaches me to ask forgiveness.
  3. Acknowledges that my philosophy and intentions are the correct ones.
  4. Submits unquestioningly to my perceptions of reality from that point on.

This goes far beyond just wanting to prove myself right. This is me wanting to be the very identity of rightness, the deliverer of its word, the voice of truth that the wrong-minded must surrender to. This is trying to claim godhood for myself, and ironically, I show what an unworthy and petty God I would be in the way that I imagine it.

These fantasies are more than unwise, they’re downright dangerous. They seduce us into a state of self-idolatry, which shuts ourselves off from being able to connect with the real God. To overcome the toxic effect of these fantasies we must surrender judgment and justice for those that have wronged us to God, and God alone.

Posted on by Abe Austin

Scriptural Analysis- Exodus 27:20-21

20 And thou shalt command the children of Israel, that they bring thee pure oil olive beaten for the light, to cause the lamp to burn always.

21 In the tabernacle of the congregation without the veil, which is before the testimony, Aaron and his sons shall order it from evening to morning before the Lord: it shall be a statute for ever unto their generations on the behalf of the children of Israel.

We already heard about the seven lamps upon the menorah within the tabernacle, but today we learn about the oil that they would use. A wick would be placed into the oil that would absorb the oil up into its body. When lit, the wick would continually absorb up more oil as the previous oil was consumed in the flame. Being saturated by the oil, the wick would be able to tolerate the flame and not immediately turn to ash as it would if it were dry.

There is clear symbolism here, wherein the wick is our soul, the oil is the spirit of Christ, and the flame is the glory of God. Surrendering our lives to God’s glory is like being subjected to a fire, glorious and scorching at the same time, but we are able to tolerate its heat by the constant refreshing of His spirit. If the spirit in us is not refreshed, we will eventually run out and be left vulnerable to the flame. So, just as the priests were required to replace the oil “to cause the lamp to burn always,” we must continually seek spiritual refreshment to keep our spiritual flame forever alive. This brings to mind Jesus’s promise to be a fountain constantly springing up into everlasting life within us.

Another point that must be made is the requirement that the oil to be used was “pure oil olive beaten.” There were two ways of extracting the oil from olives. The first was to put them into a mill and grind them. This would extract a lot of oil quickly, but it would be filled with the sediment of the broken olives and particles from the stones used in the mill. The other method was to beat and bruise them in a pestle, after which the oil would flow out freely, extremely clear and pure.

Crushed olives, mixed with the sediment of the world, produces a cloudy oil. So, too, fragmented gospel, mixed with the trends of the world, produces an unclear vision. Pure truth takes precision and effort to extract. It includes beating out our misconceptions and bruising our ego, often flowing from our wounds. Of course, there is also symbolism of Christ as the olive that was beaten and bruised, and His spirit flowing out of his wounds for all of us.

Note: It can be difficult to visualize some of the structures described in these verses. Here is an excellent and extremely focused series of animations that show the visual form of the temple and its instruments, built up verse-by-verse from the Exodus record: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLpjohncRg94EZ55nJrbaKfi-lfeo3MFgl&si=6wm1J9Sdnu7LKYC_

Posted on by Abe Austin

Scriptural Analysis- Exodus 27:18-19

18 The length of the court shall be an hundred cubits, and the breadth fifty every where, and the height five cubits of fine twined linen, and their sockets of brass.

19 All the vessels of the tabernacle in all the service thereof, and all the pins thereof, and all the pins of the court, shall be of brass.

The dimensions of the entire courtyard are restated, and also we are told that the height of the curtain walls will be five cubits, the same as the width of each individual curtain. Five cubits is approximately 7.5 feet, so tall enough to conceal the interior courtyard from the outside view. However, it is only half of the height of the tabernacle walls which were ten cubits high, or 15 feet.

The effect of this would be that from a distance one would be able to see the wall, and then the top of the tabernacle floating above it. As one approached, and the angle to the top of the wall became steeper, the top of the building would descend out of view, but of course, after one passed through the outer gate, then they would be able to see the entire tabernacle, base to top.

Personally, that feels a lot like my own spiritual journey. I caught a glimpse of heaven from afar, and I start to move towards it, but then obstacles and doubts begin to cloud what I had previously witnessed. When I push on, though, even when I cannot hold the vision of heaven before me, I eventually press through the wall and it appears to me, fuller and truer than ever before.

Note: It can be difficult to visualize some of the structures described in these verses. Here is an excellent and extremely focused series of animations that show the visual form of the temple and its instruments, built up verse-by-verse from the Exodus record: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLpjohncRg94EZ55nJrbaKfi-lfeo3MFgl&si=6wm1J9Sdnu7LKYC_

Posted on by Abe Austin

Scriptural Analysis- Exodus 27:12-17

12 And for the breadth of the court on the west side shall be hangings of fifty cubits: their pillars ten, and their sockets ten.

13 And the breadth of the court on the east side eastward shall be fifty cubits.

14 The hangings of one side of the gate shall be fifteen cubits: their pillars three, and their sockets three.

15 And on the other side shall be hangings fifteen cubits: their pillars three, and their sockets three.

16 And for the gate of the court shall be an hanging of twenty cubits, of blue, and purple, and scarlet, and fine twined linen, wrought with needlework: and their pillars shall be four, and their sockets four.

17 All the pillars round about the court shall be filleted with silver; their hooks shall be of silver, and their sockets of brass.

Yesterday we heard of the north and south walls of the courtyard, which are the two long sides. Now we hear about the two shorter sides on the east and west. Each of these will be fifty cubits long, or 75 feet. Thus, the length of the courtyard is exactly double the width, and the width of the courtyard is about 4 times the width of the tabernacle that sits inside of it, once again allowing ample room to move around its perimeter.

As with the long sides, the short sides are to have 5-cubit long curtains, with pillars in between. On the east side, where one enters, there will be fifteen cubits of wall on each side of a twenty-cubit gate, divided into four portions, with four pillars in between. As mentioned yesterday, we are not explicitly told the color of the courtyard wall, but many assume that it was white. This gate, however, we are told will match with the curtains of the tabernacle: blue and purple and scarlet, decorated with fine needlework. Thus, the entry to the courtyard is marked with the design of the inner tabernacle.

This outer appearance of the interior pattern seems symbolic to me. Many the sinner has seen the pattern of God in his first steps back towards absolution. While the sinner may yet have a way to go to reach wholeness, he perceives that he is already on the road to paradise. This seems to be reflected in how one passes through a blue-purple-scarlet gate, even before having made their sacrifice, and even if they are not able to pass into the holy place, or the most holy place. They are still on the path that ultimately, through the end of this life and into the next, will allow them to pass into all of the Lord’s most holy places, and that truth is alluded to at the very first gate.

Note: It can be difficult to visualize some of the structures described in these verses. Here is an excellent and extremely focused series of animations that show the visual form of the temple and its instruments, built up verse-by-verse from the Exodus record: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLpjohncRg94EZ55nJrbaKfi-lfeo3MFgl&si=6wm1J9Sdnu7LKYC_

Posted on by Abe Austin

Scriptural Analysis- Exodus 27:9-11

9 And thou shalt make the court of the tabernacle: for the south side southward there shall be hangings for the court of fine twined linen of an hundred cubits long for one side:

10 And the twenty pillars thereof and their twenty sockets shall be of brass; the hooks of the pillars and their fillets shall be of silver.

11 And likewise for the north side in length there shall be hangings of an hundred cubits long, and his twenty pillars and their twenty sockets of brass; the hooks of the pillars and their fillets of silver.

The external wall around the court of the tabernacle would be a long stretch of linen, twenty sheets long, covering a distance of 150 feet. This means that the tabernacle itself would be less than a third of the courtyard’s full length. There would therefore be a great deal of room for gathering and performing sacrifices at the altar.

This outer linen wall is typically said to have been white, though I cannot find an official verification of that in the scriptures. Undyed linen is usually a white or off-white color, so perhaps the assumption is that it would have been that color by default. If so, it would have stood out brightly against the earthy tones of the wilderness and would have been an obvious symbol of purity. If it were white, that does raise the question of how the parts of the tabernacle were maintained, cleaned, and replaced. The bible account does not shine a light there, though.

The linen wall was not a single, unbroken sheet, but was interrupted twenty time by pillars. We are not told the interior material of the pillars, but one would assume shittim wood, as with every other component. Interestingly, we are also not told of any metal overlay upon the pillar. We are told that its sockets would be brass, to match the rest of the courtyard elements, and its hooks would be of silver, but it would seem that the body of the pillar was just bare wood. The transition from bare wood pillars to gold-overlaid pillars seems like a symbol of the change of the naked, natural man being clothed by God’s grace and atonement, just like Adam and Eve as they left the garden of Eden.

Note: It can be difficult to visualize some of the structures described in these verses. Here is an excellent and extremely focused series of animations that show the visual form of the temple and its instruments, built up verse-by-verse from the Exodus record: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLpjohncRg94EZ55nJrbaKfi-lfeo3MFgl&si=6wm1J9Sdnu7LKYC_

Posted on by Abe Austin

Scriptural Analysis- Exodus 27:6-8

6 And thou shalt make staves for the altar, staves of shittim wood, and overlay them with brass.

7 And the staves shall be put into the rings, and the staves shall be upon the two sides of the altar, to bear it.

8 Hollow with boards shalt thou make it: as it was shewed thee in the mount, so shall they make it.

As with the Ark of the Covenant and the table of shewbread, the altar would have rings and staves. These staves were to be overlaid with brass, to match the metal of the altar, just as the previous staves had been overlaid in gold to match their respective counterparts.

The altar was considerably larger than either the table or the ark. It was probably quite heavy, even with its hollow interior. Of course, the length of the staves is not specified, and perhaps they extended far enough out for several men to lift each side. Presumably the rings on the side were very solid, so that they wouldn’t snap off under the weight.

There were other elements included as part of the tabernacle: the laver of water in the courtyard and the incense altar in the holy place, but we will not hear about these until chapter 30. For now, we are finished reading about the instruments of the tabernacle, and all that remains is to hear the description of the wall around the courtyard. We will move on to those with the next verses.

Note: It can be difficult to visualize some of the structures described in these verses. Here is an excellent and extremely focused series of animations that show the visual form of the temple and its instruments, built up verse-by-verse from the Exodus record: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLpjohncRg94EZ55nJrbaKfi-lfeo3MFgl&si=6wm1J9Sdnu7LKYC_

Posted on by Abe Austin

Scriptural Analysis- Exodus 27:2-5

2 And thou shalt make the horns of it upon the four corners thereof: his horns shall be of the same: and thou shalt overlay it with brass.

3 And thou shalt make his pans to receive his ashes, and his shovels, and his basins, and his fleshhooks, and his firepans: all the vessels thereof thou shalt make of brass.

4 And thou shalt make for it a grate of network of brass; and upon the net shalt thou make four brasen rings in the four corners thereof.

5 And thou shalt put it under the compass of the altar beneath, that the net may be even to the midst of the altar.

Yesterday we heard the dimensions and underlying structure of the altar in the tabernacle courtyard and now we hear how it was to be overlaid and adorned. First, we are told that four horns were to be erected on its four corners. These might have been in the shape of actual horns like one might see on an animal, or perhaps they were a vague, raised shape like a pyramid or an obelisk. There is no special symbolism described for the four horns, but we hear from later passages that the guilty would sometimes go and cling to them as a way of seeking sanctuary.

All of the altar, we are told, was to be covered in brass, the same as the sockets of the outer pillars of the tabernacle. Just as gold adorned everything within the tabernacle, the less-valuable brass will be used to adorn everything in the courtyard. Of course, of all the metals brass is one of the most visually similar to gold. They both share a particular yellowish-brown color. Thus, even while making the exterior portion of the tabernacle distinct from the interior, they do still appear to be connected. So, too, our journey to God goes through multiple stages, but all of it is part of the same process.

Finally, we are told of the instruments for the altar. There are, of course, two main components to the altar.

  1. The fire burning at the bottom, for which there were to be fashioned brass shovels and firepans.
  2. The animal to be burned in that fire, for which there were to be fashioned brass basins and fleshhooks.

Finally, mediating between these two is the brass grate that was to rest halfway down the interior of the altar. The animal carcass, of course, would rest upon this as it was burned, the animal not passing down into the coals, but the heat passing up into the flesh. The grate is therefore both a separator and a unifier. It is a symbol for Christ who stands between God and man, simultaneously keeping us separate from the divine justice that would condemn us, while also bringing us in contact with the divine grace that will redeem us.

Note: It can be difficult to visualize some of the structures described in these verses. Here is an excellent and extremely focused series of animations that show the visual form of the temple and its instruments, built up verse-by-verse from the Exodus record: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLpjohncRg94EZ55nJrbaKfi-lfeo3MFgl&si=6wm1J9Sdnu7LKYC_

Posted on by Abe Austin

Scriptural Analysis- Exodus 27:1

1 And thou shalt make an altar of shittim wood, five cubits long, and five cubits broad; the altar shall be foursquare: and the height thereof shall be three cubits.

We have finished for the time being with the tabernacle, and now turn our attention to the outer courtyard that the tabernacle would sit within. As with the tabernacle, we start by describing the instruments and edifices that were to be placed within the courtyard, the first of which being the sacrificial altar.

In today’s verse we hear the dimensions of the altar. It is a square, five cubits by five, or 7.5 feet on each side. It is three cubits tall, or 4.5 feet, which is a pretty ideal height for laying things down to be burned. As with all the other elements of the temple, its body would be composed of shittim wood. We will hear of its overlaying and adornment in tomorrow’s verses.

This altar would, of course, be used for the offering of every large animal. Later verses, such as Exodus 29:11, seem to suggest that the animal may not have been slaughtered and prepared upon the altar, but was only burned there. Therefore, the altar is not an instrument of death, but the instrument by which that which is already dead is transformed into smoke, which is obviously a symbol of spirit. It is a place where those that have perished are consumed by the fire of God in order to be transformed to a new and better state. It is a hopeful, joyful instrument.

Note: It can be difficult to visualize some of the structures described in these verses. Here is an excellent and extremely focused series of animations that show the visual form of the temple and its instruments, built up verse-by-verse from the Exodus record: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLpjohncRg94EZ55nJrbaKfi-lfeo3MFgl&si=6wm1J9Sdnu7LKYC_

Posted on by Abe Austin

Great Forgiveness

Great forgiveness is not passively forgetting your pain over the passage of time, but actively surrendering it while it still burns bright. Obviously, forgiving over time after the pain has died down is better than not forgiving at all, but it is only a step towards greater, more active forgiveness.

Jesus gave an incredible standard for forgiveness when he declared, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” He was not only forgiving those who tortured and killed him, but he was doing it in the very moment that they were carrying out that torture and execution, not after he was resurrected and impervious to their pain. Perhaps we will never get all the way to being able to match such great forgiveness as that, but that is the ideal that we are meant to move in the direction of.

Great forgiveness is not passive, it is active.

Posted on by Abe Austin

True Forgiveness

True forgiveness isn’t about trying to minimize the wrongs of others, or to trying to justify their flagrant offenses away.

True forgiveness is knowing that what the other person did is objectively condemnable and that you would be absolutely within your rights to demand justice, but turning it all over to God anyway. It is letting God be the judge, letting Him choose justice or mercy according to His will.

True forgiveness is not excusing, it is releasing.