Posted on by Abe Austin

Calloused Hearts- Personal Example

I once went to a spiritual retreat in the mountains. There were sermons shared, a great deal of prayer, and time alone to walk in nature. It was a wonderful, spiritual experience. Throughout all the first day I felt my heart opening up and connecting to God. Away from the distractions of the world I could really hear God clearly. We had a more direct communication than I was used to, and I properly understood where I was in life, what was holding me back, and what God would like me to do to advance further.

But when I woke up on the second day of the retreat I found a strange numbness had come over me. I attended the first sermons of the day and struggled to be fully present with them. By the time I hit the second or third lecture the messages had rubbed away my emotional walls and I started to feel spiritually awake again. I had another positive experience throughout the rest of the day.

The third morning the coating of numbness was even thicker. I really wanted to engage with the spirit but it felt like many layers had grown on my heart overnight. The exposure to God, while wonderful, had been tenderizing. There had been a great deal of emotion and my heart had felt more raw and exposed than it was accustomed to. Just like how skin rubbed raw will begin to blister and callous to protect the tender flesh, my heart was toughening itself against further feeling.

This time I only half coaxed my heart back out of its shell. It had reached its saturation point and needed to rest.

Overall the retreat was still a very positive experience. I felt inspired to make some long-term changes to my life and I continue to carry the benefits of that to this day, three years later. I also left with an important lesson about my heart, though. It had an emotional capacity, a threshold for what it was willing to feel. And just like any other muscle, the heart has to be exercised to increase that capacity. I needed more experiences like this retreat to acclimate it to prolonged deep feelings.

Posted on by Abe Austin

Influence and Persuasion- Jeremiah 29:11-13, Jeremiah 4:1

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.
Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you.
And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.

If thou wilt return, O Israel, saith the Lord, return unto me: and if thou wilt put away thine abominations out of my sight, then shalt thou not remove.

COMMENTARY

Then shall ye call upon me, and I will hearken unto you. And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.
Yesterday I considered how God plays the long game, patiently waiting for us to return to Him by our own volition. And frankly, this is a very hard thing that he expects us to do. Arguably the work of returning to God is the most difficult we do in this life.
The way back is through repentance, sometimes-painful self-examination, the mourning of wounds both inflicted and received, the overcoming of our powerful vices, and the healing of doubts and fears.
And again, He expects us to enroll ourselves in this process. He still adamantly refuses to make that choice for us.
And…we do it. Nowhere is the nobility of God’s children more clear in how we commit ourselves to this most grand endeavor. As this verse suggests, we search for Him with all our heart. We call, we seek, we put in what it takes to come back home.

If thou wilt return, return unto me: then shalt thou not remove.
And the genius of this plan is that it means when we come back to God, we come back firmly! Satan’s methods might procure more immediate results, but God’s procure lasting ones. We all leave God once, but once we return with our whole heart, it is very few that ever leave Him again.

Posted on by Abe Austin

Dealing With Failure- Psalm 51:1-3, 6-7, 1 Peter 5:6

Have mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness: according unto the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions.
Wash me throughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.
For I acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin is ever before me.
Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part thou shalt make me to know wisdom.
Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.

Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time:

COMMENTARY

Have mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness
According unto the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions
I am continuing to examine the need to surrender my shame and burdens to God. Rather than always trying to make myself be better, I ought to let Him make me better.
But how do I do that? What are the steps to surrendering? What are the words that I must say to better invite God into my life?
I started asking myself these questions before I realized that I was making the exact same mistake as before! I was looking for some specific quota to fill that would bring God into my life. I wanted to be told “say these special words, pray this many times, help this many people.” And at its core this was all about having my healing be in my own power again. God will save me, just as soon as I earn His saving.
And as before, that’s just not how it works. As the psalm quoted above explains, it is according to His lovingkindness, and it is according to His mercies. It has to be His way, done on His own terms, and in His own due time. His will, not ours.

Humble yourselves under the hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time
The only formula that I should maintain is to try my genuine best, keep an open heart, hold out hope, trust that He will come, invite Him with sincerity, and be totally honest with Him and myself.
After all that, at what point along that journey will He show up? I have no clue.
When will He decide that I’m ready for His grace? Totally up to Him.
How and when will He heal my heart? Not for me to say.
I just trust that in His own time, in His own way, and by His own criteria…He will be there.

Posted on by Abe Austin

For Our Own Good- Exodus 3:16-17, 4:10

Go, and gather the elders of Israel together, and say unto them, The Lord God of your fathers, the God of Abraham, of Isaac, and of Jacob, appeared unto me, saying, I have surely visited you, and seen that which is done to you in Egypt:
And I have said, I will bring you up out of the affliction of Egypt unto the land of the Canaanite, and the Hittites, and the Amorites, and the Perizzites, and the Hivites, and the Jebusites, unto a land flowing with milk and honey.
And Moses said unto the Lord, O my Lord, I am not eloquent, neither heretofore, nor since thou hast spoken unto thy servant: but I am slow of speech, and of a slow tongue.

COMMENTARY

Go, and gather the elders of Israel together, and say unto them, The Lord God will bring you up out of the affliction of Egypt unto the land of the Canaanite
And Moses said unto the Lord, O my Lord, I am not eloquent, neither heretofore, nor since thou hast spoken unto thy servant: but I am slow of speech, and of a slow tongue
Yesterday we spoke of how each of us requires a “mighty change of heart” in our lives. I believe that many would say they agree with that statement, but then specify that for them it is a cosmetic change only, not a structural one. Meaning we most often feel that the underlying desires of our heart are already perfect, and we just need to follow them better. We see our actions as flawed, but our paradigms as perfect,
However, as we see in this scripture, that wasn’t the case with Moses. He was already a good and honest man whom the Lord was willing to reveal Himself to, yet Moses still needed to change his image of what was right in order to keep the commandment that God was giving to him.
Similarly, Sariah was a good and faithful woman whose heart wasn’t ready to receive a child, and Abraham’s heart wasn’t ready to receive the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. Peter needed an intervention to consider the Gentiles as worthy of receiving the gospel. Jonah wanted the city of Nineveh to be burned, contrary to the Lord’s will. These were all good people, yet people who still needed to change.
God does not only intend to change the hearts of the wicked and sinful, but even of the righteous. His intention is not to make us into the best people that we can imagine, but even into people that we have never before considered.

Posted on by Abe Austin

The Captive Heart- Psalm 34:18, Luke 15:7, Matthew 5:3-6

The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.

I say unto you, that likewise joy shall be in heaven over one sinner that repenteth, more than over ninety and nine just persons, which need no repentance.

Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.
Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.
Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.

COMMENTARY

The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart
Joy shall be in heaven over one sinner that repenteth, more than over ninety and nine which need no repentance
Blessed are the poor in spirit, blessed are they that mourn, blessed are the meek, blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness
Previously we spoke of how Jesus came to rescue the lost and the broken, and so long as we maintain that we’re “just fine,” there is very little that he can do for us. The Psalmist also recognized that the ones that the Lord is nearest to are not the perfect and seemingly well-put-together, but rather those with broken hearts and contrite spirits.
Indeed, Jesus goes so far as to say that there is greater joy in heaven for the lost soul that is saved, than for ninety-nine saved souls that were retained. He also specifically calls out blessings on the poor in spirit, the mournful, the meek, and the hungry.
The gospel takes the things that are paradoxes and contradictions in normal life, and makes them possible. And in the gospel, it is blessed to be broken.

Posted on by Abe Austin

The Virtue of Remembering- Hebrews 10:17; Alma 36:17, 19

And their sins and iniquities will I remember no more.

And it came to pass that as I was thus racked with torment, while I was harrowed up by the memory of my many sins, behold, I remembered also to have heard my father prophesy unto the people concerning the coming of one Jesus Christ, a Son of God, to atone for the sins of the world.
And now, behold, when I thought this, I could remember my pains no more; yea, I was harrowed up by the memory of my sins no more.

COMMENTARY

And their sins and iniquities will I remember no more
Thus far we have spent a great while discussing the need for constant remembrance. But here we come to a very interesting verse, one where God attests to His own selective remembrance. One of the most encouraging things that we can ever remember is that God doesn’t have to.
Of course the assumption is not that God loses a piece of His infinite knowledge, but rather that when we are willing to repent, He does not care to hold on to the offense anymore. “Remembering no more” means being able to release the guilt and condemnation of it.

While I was harrowed up by the memory of my many sins, I remembered also to have heard concerning the coming of one Jesus Christ
And now, behold, when I thought this, I could remember my pains no more; yea, I was harrowed up by the memory of my sins no more
And, thankfully, this isn’t a miracle that is exclusive to God. We, too, can let go the remembrance of our own damnation. Yes, we will still remember our actions, but we do not have to live in our guilt and our shame once we have had them taken from us. The lively terror of being cast off can be surrendered forever.
Alma illustrates this beautifully in his account of how he was kept in a horrible remembrance of pain, which he was then able to replace with the remembrance of Jesus’s atonement. And just like that a bitter memory was turned into something beautiful.

Posted on by Abe Austin

The Virtue of Remembering- Exodus 13:16, Hebrews 10:16

And it shall be for a token upon thine hand, and for frontlets between thine eyes: for by strength of hand the Lord brought us forth out of Egypt.

This is the covenant that I will make with them after those days, saith the Lord, I will put my laws into their hearts, and in their minds will I write them;

COMMENTARY

And it shall be for a token upon thine hand, and for frontlets between thine eyes
The Ancient Israelites took strips of paper, wrote scriptures upon them, and bound them to their hands and foreheads. Yes, this practice was to help them remember the words, but the exact placement chosen by the Lord was meant to suggest something further. Upon the forehead to imply seeing the will of God wherever you look. Upon the hand to imply doing the work of God in all that you do.
The Israelites were being told to not just remember the words, but by the remembering be moved by them. Remembering God’s words is meant to color every aspect of our life, not be sequestered into a single meeting at church.

I will put my laws into their hearts, and in their minds will I write them
In this verse we are promised that God’s law will be written into our minds, suggesting that we remember the words of it always. But as with the Israelites of old, if we stop at remembering the words only we have only received half of the promise. For also we are told that the law is to be put into our hearts as well. We need to know the law, but we need to feel it, too. We need to remember its injunctions, but also its intent. We need to consider its structure, but also its joy.

Posted on by Abe Austin · 2 Comments

Active Discipleship- 2 Corinthians 9:7, 1 Corinthians 13:3, Moroni 7:6

Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, so let him give; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loveth a cheerful giver.

And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

For behold, God hath said a man being evil cannot do that which is good; for if he offereth a gift, or prayeth unto God, except he shall do it with real intent it profiteth him nothing.

COMMENTARY

Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, so let him give
At first glance, it may appear that this verse condones a more passive discipleship. If you do not feel the push to give yourself fully to the gospel, then don’t. Just invest to what degree you feel like. One might try to use this verse as justification to dabble with God and say that that was enough.
But that is a misreading of the passage. It does not say “according as he purposeth in his mind,” it says the “heart.” It has always been my mind that tries to rationalize effortless discipleship, but my heart has always yearned to give myself even more to God. I think many of us, if we are really honest with ourselves, have a heart that is more giving than we allow it to be. Not a one of us has a stingy heart…only a suppressed one.

Though I bestow my goods to feed the poor, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing
For if he offereth a gift, except he shall do it with real intent it profiteth him nothing
And so long as we keep our hearts suppressed, then we will receive no benefit for whatever token efforts we make. God is not going to reward us for our begrudging discipleship. He is not going to pat us on the back for doing things devoid of any real heart. If He did, it would reinforce our passive lifestyle, and prove detrimental for our development. Thus it becomes all too easy to make a half-hearted effort at following God, receive no spiritual nourishment for it, and then say “see, there’s no benefit in this.” But even as we say this, our conscience knows we never really tried.
God is not content with us going through the motions like trained monkeys. He is a jealous God, and He wants our hearts. Real relationships require real investment, and God wants the realest relationship with us imaginable.

Posted on by Abe Austin

Active Discipleship- Romans 2:15, John 8:9, 1 Timothy 4:2

Which shew the work of the law written in their hearts, their conscience also bearing witness, and their thoughts the mean while accusing or else excusing one another;

And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.

Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron;

COMMENTARY

Their conscience also bearing witness, their thoughts accusing or else excusing one another
And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one
Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron
Yesterday I mentioned that all of us need to feel a motivation to follow God. We need something to convince us that life is better with Him as our companion than remaining on our own.
Well, it turns out that God has a way to accomplish this, and it is ingenious. He simply puts a little voice in us that urges us to do what is right, and “sears” us when we do wrong. We might try and say “I don’t need God, I can just live how I want.” We might try…but our conscience will not let us rest with that decision for long. We might settle into worldly comfort, but we will feel “convicted” in our soul.
The argument for complacency is that it is peaceful, but there can never be true peace when the conscience is distressed. If there is peace in the heart, though, then all is peace, no matter what tumult rages without. Thus no matter how we try to reason away our complacency, our conscience will always trouble us back to active discipleship.

Posted on by Abe Austin

Respect in Our Differences- John 4:9-10, 19-21, 23

Then saith the woman of Samaria unto him, How is it that thou, being a Jew, askest drink of me, which am a woman of Samaria? for the Jews have no dealings with the Samaritans.
Jesus answered and said unto her, If thou knewest the gift of God, and who it is that saith to thee, Give me to drink; thou wouldest have asked of him, and he would have given thee living water.
The woman saith unto him, Sir, I perceive that thou art a prophet.
Our fathers worshipped in this mountain; and ye say, that in Jerusalem is the place where men ought to worship.
Jesus saith unto her, Woman, believe me, the hour cometh, when ye shall neither in this mountain, nor yet at Jerusalem, worship the Father.
But the hour cometh, and now is, when the true worshippers shall worship the Father in spirit and in truth: for the Father seeketh such to worship him.

COMMENTARY

For the Jews have no dealings with the Samaritans
The Father seeketh such to worship him
When Jesus attempted to travel through Samaria, they denied him entrance into their village. His disciples then asked him if they should call down fire to destroy that nation and he rebuked them for such a suggestion (Luke 9:51-56).
In the encounter between Jesus and the Samaritan woman, we see that Jesus still retains thoughtful concern for these children, and looks forward to a day that the boundaries between them can be broken. He makes clear that the Father still seeks for people like her to share in the riches of heaven.
I am convinced that the highest courts of heaven will be populated by Christians and Jews and Muslims and Hindus and Buddhists, and all other manner of sincere seekers for truth. If we try our best, but are somewhat misaligned, our trying is not going to be discounted because of it. Let us never forget, that in the end, “the LORD looketh on the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7).