Posted on by Abe Austin

Sharing Feelings- Difficult Conversations

I Would Rather Die)

In my last post I made the claim that the type of “sharing feelings” that men need most is admission of guilt and shame. Honestly, that probably goes for women also, but I don’t have extensive personal experience with that, like I do with men. I have seen many men burdened with depression, fear, anxiety, and purposelessness. That has been me, myself. In every case, the first step that must be taken, and then taken repeatedly again throughout life, is the admission of one’s secret wrongs, so that forgiveness and surrender can take place.

These are inherently difficult conversations to have. I cannot think of any that would be harder. Disclosing your deepest wrongs is the single most likely way to break relationships, face painful consequences, and risk total abandonment. It is social and emotional suicide, and many men would rather commit actual suicide than go there. One of the most common things I have heard (and personally felt) is that men feel like admitting these things would kill us. We men often only make these confessions because we finally decide that a quick and sharp death is better than the long, drawn out one that we are experiencing. What a shock and amazement to discover that actually this is the path to life.

Jesus described the path to life as “strait and narrow,” (Matthew 7:14). The things that we must do are clear, precise, and narrowly defined. They are simple and accessible to all. Yet “few there be that find it,” because the first step of that path is the one gate that most of us think we will never pass through: confession of our shame.

Culture of Confession)

I believe confession is necessarily hard. I do not think it will ever be easy. A lot of people talk about changing the culture to make it more acceptable for men to “talk about their feelings,” and I do believe we could make a push to normalize confession culturally, removing the social stigmas around it that are unnecessary, but I don’t think it will ever actually stop being anything less than the hardest thing we ever do. It simply isn’t in our nature to make confession until we have exhausted every other possible option.

And that’s okay. We can never become the greatest version of ourselves without fear, sacrifice, and restoration. Facing something that scares us to death and breaking through that barrier is the gateway into new life. Jesus, himself, explained this when he said, “except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God” (John 3:3). Paradise is only available to the reborn, and rebirth assumes the death of the old self.

Thus, even if we ever did create a culture of confession such that there was no fear in admitting to our deepest wrongs, there would still be a need for another crippling fear that we would rather die than face, and a courageous leap into that death, and a rebirth on the other side. Personally, I consider it more likely that confession will just always serve as that primal fear.

I want to be clear that I absolutely know how hard the things I am advocating for are. I know it firsthand. I do not encourage men to seek this soul-shattering experience lightly. I only advocate for it because I know it is the only way, and that what is on the other side is worth it. In fact, it is so much more than just “worth it.” It isn’t that life continues on the other side of confession, it is that it begins. Everything before it is simply a walking death. Everything after it is the genuine article. And so yes, I acknowledge that this is hard, but I bear my witness that it is right and true. May I meet you one day on the other side.

Posted on by Abe Austin

Scriptural Analysis- Leviticus 8:18-21

18 And he brought the ram for the burnt offering: and Aaron and his sons laid their hands upon the head of the ram.

19 And he killed it; and Moses sprinkled the blood upon the altar round about.

20 And he cut the ram into pieces; and Moses burnt the head, and the pieces, and the fat.

21 And he washed the inwards and the legs in water; and Moses burnt the whole ram upon the altar: it was a burnt sacrifice for a sweet savour, and an offering made by fire unto the Lord; as the Lord commanded Moses.

In our last post we had the sin offering as part of the consecration process of Aaron and his sons and priests, and today it is immediately followed by the burnt offering. Thus, the spiritual sequence for the priests was to first give up their sinful ways, and then to give their lives to God. Tomorrow will move on to the consecration offering, which completes the journey, and represents oneness and unity with God. That is the entire gospel journey in three simple steps.

And notice, that even though these rituals have been fulfilled in Christ, the underlying path still remains the same. Repentance for sin, surrender of self, and unity with God are still the path of discipleship even today. Not one jot or tittle has passed, only the manner in which we interface with that underlying pattern.

The ancient Israelites were not a people so different as we might think. We have more in common with them than not. And, most importantly, at the fundamental level we are identical. Just like them, we still are afflicted by sin. We still struggle to surrender our will to God. We still suffer from separation from the Almighty. We still need sacrifice, surrender, and grace to overcome those challenges. We are still God’s children, and He is still our Father. The path for us to follow has always been there, unchanged. The unique details of modern life are but surface periphery, meaningless vapor in the wind, while He remains a constant through it all.

Posted on by Abe Austin

Grit vs Surrender- Summary

The Journey We’ve Been On)

In the course of this study, I have argued in favor of Jesus’s claim in Matthew 11:28-30

Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

Through this study I have made special effort to address the two groups that might disagree with this claim: the unbeliever who sees the commandments of God as a terrible burden, and the believer who struggles every day to be worthy of God’s expectations. Here were the main points in my study:

  1. The liberation of the commandments. I examined how the true purpose of God’s restrictions is to free us from the demands of addiction and vice, which are the great taskmasters of humanity. Yes, God requires us to surrender to Him, but it is a surrender into rest and peace.
  2. Refutation of self-made perfection. I discussed how God never intended for us to perfect ourselves through sheer moral grit. Through that act of surrendering to Him we open the door to a miracle: effortless change.
  3. Surrendering will and autonomy. Yes, achieving a state of rest, peace, and effortless change is possible, but only at the cost of unconditional surrender to God. The one truly difficult task that God requires of us is to give up our autonomy and submit to His will.
  4. The easy way. The scriptures are full of examples of those who made this surrender, then found that God shouldered their burdens, accomplished miracles in their lives, and gave them easy victories. We talked about Gideon’s army, but also consider the examples of Peter fishing, the widow’s cruse of oil, the parting of the Red Sea, and the siege of Jericho.

The Great Secret)

Speaking for myself, I am not yet done surrendering my will to God. I am still very much a work in progress. This is because even after having had some practice at it, surrendering is still hard to do. It’s hard, but it’s worth it.

As difficult as surrender may be, it is still easier than the alternative lifestyles of grit or appetite-satiation. And once that surrender is made, everything afterward is weightless. I have learned these facts for myself, personally.

So, surrender is easier, but it does not at first appear so. I believe this is by design. It ensures that no one accidentally stumbles into that better way. They have to take what appears to be the harder path, by faith, before they can finally discover for themselves that it is actually much, much easier.

This is the great secret. Many people live and die, never understanding what it was all about. They are perpetually frustrated, always searching for success and satisfaction, but never finding it, and yet the answer was there in front of them all the time. Hopefully you and I can do it better.

Posted on by Abe Austin

Being on the Right Side

I always thought that there were just two sides, one of right, and one of wrong. I thought all the world was black-and-white.

My perception on that has shifted, but not to the cliché that it’s all just shades of gray. Rather, I now see it as black, and white, and black again. It isn’t just one side good and one side bad, it’s bad on this side and bad on that side, with one narrow strip of good down the middle.

This means you can’t just run full speed from the ledge on one side, because there’s soon a ledge on the other side as well. It truly is a “strait and narrow way,” with a steep slope on either side, and once you start down those slopes, gravity will make it very easy to roll all the way to the bottom.

Being aligned with good and with God is therefore a very careful and deliberate work. No one walks His line by accident. We have to constantly check ourselves and reevaluate our positions against revealed truth as we make our way forward.

Posted on by Abe Austin

Scriptural Analysis- Exodus 32:9-10

9 And the Lord said unto Moses, I have seen this people, and, behold, it is a stiffnecked people:

10 Now therefore let me alone, that my wrath may wax hot against them, and that I may consume them: and I will make of thee a great nation.

These are some interesting verses, showing God with a singular intent, and in the next verses we will hear how Moses dissuaded Him from it. Does this mean that God’s plans were not set in stone? How does this sort of behavior stack up to the Christian teaching that God is always right and can always be trusted? How can He be all-merciful if Moses is showing a greater degree of mercy than He is?

We’ll examine several aspects of these questions over the next couple days as we consider each batch of verses. For today I will address two of these issues, starting with the question of whether or not God’s plans are set in stone. How could His plans and promises be fulfilled if He destroyed the people He had intended to save?

An explanation for this is that there can be multiple acceptable paths by which the Lord is able to accomplish His purposes and promises. Either He could continue to strive with the children of Jacob, or He could cut them off and raise the children of Moses to receive the Promised Land instead. Obviously, either path would fulfill His promises to Abraham and the Israelite people as a whole.

As for the matter of whether God was all-merciful or not, I would say that this story illustrates that God is all-good. Justice is good. Mercy is good. God is able to execute perfect justice, and He is also capable of showing perfect mercy. Many of us are not so versatile. We are either very good at showing mercy, but weak at standing up for justice, or else we are good at maintaining justice, but struggle to show mercy. In the course of these verses, we see God’s openness to both, which is a testament to His full breadth of goodness.

Posted on by Abe Austin

Few There Be

The Narrow Way)

In the middle of his mortal ministry Jesus Christ gave the following instruction:

Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: 
Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it.
-Matthew 7:13-14

The last time I read this passage I was caught by this particular sequence of words: “few there be.”

“Few” would suggest less than half, probably significantly less than half, in any case a clear minority. And if a minority of people are finding the pathway to heaven then, by definition, the average goodness of man would be insufficient.

This makes me wonder…am I only of average goodness in my everyday dealings? Am I only of average zeal in my seeking and proclaiming of the truth? Or is my discipleship the sort of which one would say “few there be?”

Above Average)

I am also reminded of another declaration from Christ:

For if ye love them which love you, what thank have ye? for sinners also love those that love them.
And if ye do good to them which do good to you, what thank have ye? for sinners also do even the same.
And if ye lend to them of whom ye hope to receive, what thank have ye? for sinners also lend to sinners, to receive as much again.
-Luke 6:32-34

I believe that these verses describe the efforts that most people make to live good and wholesome lives. And while it certainly is not bad to love, do good, and lend to those that we are close to…once again, the default goodness is clearly not enough.

If “few there be” that find the path to eternal life, and most people are trying to be basically good, then we must aspire to be more than basically good. We must be extraordinarily good, uniquely valiant, and exceptionally virtuous. Christ says that we can find the strait and narrow way, but not by doing the status quo.

Perhaps this isn’t the comfiest of teachings, but at least Christ was good enough to forewarn us, to give us a chance to check ourselves and change our path. Pay close attention to how these words stir your heart, and give those feelings the heed and serious consideration that they are due. Don’t be going so fast that you can’t make the turn-off that takes you from where you are headed to where you need to be going. It’s a pretty narrow road, after all, and few there be that find it!

Posted on by Abe Austin

Scriptural Analysis- Genesis 26:1-5

1 And there was a famine in the land, beside the first famine that was in the days of Abraham. And Isaac went unto Abimelech king of the Philistines unto Gerar.

2 And the Lord appeared unto him, and said, Go not down into Egypt; dwell in the land which I shall tell thee of:

3 Sojourn in this land, and I will be with thee, and will bless thee; for unto thee, and unto thy seed, I will give all these countries, and I will perform the oath which I sware unto Abraham thy father;

4 And I will make thy seed to multiply as the stars of heaven, and will give unto thy seed all these countries; and in thy seed shall all the nations of the earth be blessed;

5 Because that Abraham obeyed my voice, and kept my charge, my commandments, my statutes, and my laws.

A famine occurred, much as it did for Abraham. Isaac had to set out from his home, much as did Abraham. He was led to the land of the Philistines, much as was Abraham. And along his way God promised him innumerable descendants and a great land for an inheritance, much as He had to Abraham.

But while Isaac’s story may heavily mirror Abraham’s in some parts, he still was not Abraham and he had his own, individual walk with God. That walk meant continuing the path that his father started, but he was covering new ground along his way. Some of the differences between his path and Abraham’s are how the matter of having posterity was resolved much more quickly for Isaac, he was not asked to sacrifice his son, and he was already well on his way to wealth from what he had inherited.

Many things appear to have been easier for Isaac than they were for Abraham, and perhaps that is why so little of his story is recorded in the Bible. He is the main character only for the rest of this chapter, and then the focus will shift to Jacob, his son. Isaac served his purpose of continuing the line and the promise, but greater advancement in the face of adversity would come during the next generation.

Posted on by Abe Austin

Scriptural Analysis- Genesis 24:23-24, 26-27

23 And said, Whose daughter art thou? tell me, I pray thee: is there room in thy father’s house for us to lodge in?

24 And she said unto him, I am the daughter of Bethuel the son of Milcah, which she bare unto Nahor.

26 And the man bowed down his head, and worshipped the Lord.

27 And he said, Blessed be the Lord God of my master Abraham, who hath not left destitute my master of his mercy and his truth: I being in the way, the Lord led me to the house of my master’s brethren.

The servant had marveled when he first met Rebekah. She seemed such a perfect match for Isaac, and everything was going according to plan. All that remained was the matter of her heritage, and now he discovers that everything is right in that regard as well. In all this land the very first young lady he happened upon was the very one he was looking for!

So now he bows and worships. Technically he has not gained the approval of Rebekah or her parents yet, but at this point he is convinced that this path was prepared before him by God, and so he is sure of success at the end of it.