Recently I had an opportunity to reflect on how very many blessings I have in my life right now, and I was quite moved by the tally. If I go back three short years I recall a time of life that was very dark, one where I was beset by all manner of adversity and addiction. It was at then that I finally decided to really lean into God, and the time since has been a rush of healing and growing.
There are so many things that I worried about back then that I just do not worry about now. And I can honestly say that it has nothing to do with great and impressive things that I did. Frankly the “things that I did” were the whole problem, and it took all these blessings from God to save me from them!
He has not only taken care of the essentials in my life, He has also sprinkled me with pure pleasures for no other reason than that He apparently loves to make me happy. How then can I ever be dissatisfied in life?
And yet I can. Because shortly after being in awe of my blessings, I had a couple days down in the dumps. And after having my nose tweaked a little bit all of my gratitude was immediately replaced with all sorts of indignant “this isn’t fair” and “woe is me” feelings. None of the blessings had been taken back, my life was still as bounteous as ever, but the lens I view the world in can tint even the brightest day with blackness.
Honestly just writing this post has helped my mood a great deal by how it has reminded me that those blessings are still there. And that is one of the benefits of counting one’s blessings, it allows us to cut past the murkiness that sits on top, and view the pure water that still lies beneath.